VIEW from the BLEACHERS

My personal search for signs of intelligent life in the universe and in my neighborhood

A humor blog

by Tim Jones, BA, JD, MBA, ESQ, FAQ, INC, LOL, WTF, UBU, IDK, ETC

Forget About Putin. The Real Threat to America is Poutine.

by TEJ | Mar 12, 2019 | Lifestyles humor | 2 Comments

I recently visited Canada and tried their most popular staple – a disgusting meal of greasy fries, cheese curds and gravy called Poutine. I barely made it back alive.

Mr. Popularity – The Early Years

by TEJ | Mar 4, 2019 | Fun and Leisure Humor, Lifestyles humor | 3 Comments

I know what you’re thinking. Tim, have you always been this cool, this charming, this adored by the women, and this comfortable making false claims that are easily disprovable? The answer, surprisingly, is no. I used to be quite shy and awkward. Now I’m just embarrassing to my wife and kids. But it used to be much different, back in the day.

A Millennial’s Bill of Rights

by TEJ | Feb 25, 2019 | Lifestyles humor, Parenting and Family humor | 4 Comments

Read this important proclamation written by five very promising millennials named Ryan, Amanda, Justin, Kayla and Tyler – which they will get around to proclaiming – just as soon as they respond to the latest text message sent to them from Ryan, Amanda, Justin, Kayla or Tyler.

The Secret Rules of Chess

by TEJ | Feb 18, 2019 | Parenting and Family humor | 4 Comments

As a parent, I have long tried to be a role model for my children. I have always striven to teach my daughters fundamental values like honesty and good sportsmanship – except when it came to chess. Then all bets were off. I taught my girls my Secret Rules of Chess, which, when I employ them, no eight-year-old chess wizard can defeat me.

Trump Translation Guide

by TEJ | Feb 5, 2019 | Political humor | 0 Comments

View from the Bleachers offers a list of some President Trump’s most common pronouncements, along with our best guestimate of what he actually means. We apologize for any correct spellings which may appear to contradict the President’s preferred misspelling.

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to My Surgery

by TEJ | Jan 21, 2019 | Lifestyles humor | 0 Comments

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. And sometimes those words are hilarious. Such is the case with one of the most embarrassing photos ever taken of me. It was so embarrassing that I decided to post it on Facebook and invited people to submit possible captions. Turns out there was no shortage of creative, or at least snarky suggestions for captions.