Lindsay Lohan is NOT a milkaholic!

Lindsay Lohan is NOT a milkaholic!

Lindsay Lohan drunk - thumbnailDid you happen to catch the mean-spirited Super Bowl ad by those bastards at E*Trade making fun of poor Lindsay Lohan? You know the one. It features a toddler boy talking on the phone with his toddler girlfriend who gives him grief for not calling her the night before. The girlfriend, suspicious of his behavior, confronts him and asks “And that milkaholic Lindsay wasn’t over?” just as another baby girl appears onscreen saying, “Milk-a-whaaat?” Here is the ad.

Well, hello! Could it be any more obvious this was a direct, mean-spirited frontal assault on the reputation of the quiet, publicity-shy mega-star? Of course not. So the 23-year old celebrity actress did what any average private citizen who owns five houses, a lear jet and their own line of fashion footwear  would do when an ad mentions someone who shares their first name – she sued ‘em. Yes, she filed a totally justified lawsuit against those insensitive jerks at E*Trade for their blatant efforts to defame her in this commercial. Can you blame her? It’s obviously a direct character assassination, poking cruel fun at all the past media hype about her personal struggles with addiction to alcohol and cocaine and pain killers and stimulants and cough syrup and nasal spray and cosmetic surgery and changing her hair color and going to night clubs without wearing any underwear and … (Editor’s note: the preceding passage has been abridged due to space limitations.)

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2009 – The Year in Review – As seen from the Bleachers

2009 – The Year in Review – As seen from the Bleachers

Susan Boyle

Most of you know that I am widely considered to be among the most serious journalists in my house. So this week, as I have done every year for the past 30 years, I take stock in the people and events that shaped our world over the past 365 days in the much anticipated View From the Bleachers Year in Review, or as I like to call it VFTBYIR, for short.

My, what a crazy year it’s been. Here are just a few of the highlights (and low lights):

January: As further evidence that racial discrimination is alive and well in the United States, Barack Hussein Obama is inaugurated as the 44th President, once again giving a black man the worst job in the entire nation. After a honeymoon that lasts almost two weeks, he quickly is attacked as a Black Hitler, a communist, a terrorist, and a really bad bowler.

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Kanye West’s Guide to a Kinder, Nicer YOU!

Kanye West’s Guide to a Kinder, Nicer YOU!

Kanye and TaylorA lot of ink has been spilled over Kanye West’s latest impromptu rant.  Allow me to spill more.  Unless you have been living in a cave in northern Afghanistan , you’ve no doubt heard about the rapper’s well-thought-out decision to join country music sensation Taylor Swift onstage to accept her MTV Best Female Video award.

On live TV, the ever-affable Kanye took center stage, overcoming his usual inherent shyness.  Grabbing the microphone from Taylor Swift, he cut her off in mid-sentence and blurted “I’m sorry, but Beyoncé had one of the best videos of all time.” His eloquence was greeted by a chorus of boos from a surprisingly annoyed audience and a look of complete shock from Beyoncé herself. (Go figure).

What you may not recall is that this is not the first time Kanye has pulled such a stunt. He also took center stage at the American Music Awards in 2004, declaring he was robbed of the Best New Artist award. Boorish behavior? Perhaps. But on the bright side, at least he clearly has overcome his fear of public speaking.
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