VIEW from the BLEACHERS
A humor blog
by Tim Jones, BA, JD, MBA, ESQ, FAQ, INC, LOL, WTF, UBU, IDK, ETC

Seven Immutable Laws of Car Ownership
Owning a car is a lot like being in a long-term relationship with a temperamental, unpredictable partner. At first, it’s all smooth rides as you cruise down the highway with the music blasting like Jerry Maguire singing along to Tom Petty’s song Free Fallin.’ But then, you hit a few bumps—figuratively and literally. Here are eight immutable laws of car ownership. First time car buyers, you better buckle up. You’re in for a bumpy ride.

Introducing Trump-Canceling Headphones: The Ultimate Escape
All of this non-stop bombardment of Trump 24/7 is enough to make even the most stoic person start considering a permanent vacation to a remote island where Wi-Fi is just a dream and there’s no such thing as social media. But fear not, because VFTB Enterprises is announcing the solution to your Trump-fatigue: Trump-Canceling Headphones!

Everything I Need to Know I Learned from Buddy
I used to stress out over all sorts of things. And then I met Buddy. Buddy has become my best friend. He’s taught me so much about what’s important in life – and what isn’t. Buddy has never been one to be concerned with appearances or how other people judge him. I want to be more like Buddy.

BREAKING NEWS: Trump Announces More Bold Cabinet Picks
President-Elect Trump is wasting no time in assembling his cabinet. Some of the names have outraged critics. But he is just getting started. In the upcoming week Trump plans to announce several additional bold picks for key roles within his administration, sure to drive liberals up the wall. Can you say CIA Director Putin?

Life Lessons from My Second Best Friend
My best friend for the past 37+ years has been my wife. But for most of my life, my second best friend has been my younger sister, Betsy. Sadly, she passed away in 2021. In looking back at her life and our close lifelong bond, I realize she taught me many lessons about how to be a better, kinder, more generous person.

My Face is a Beard-Free Zone
There have been literally thousands, if not millions, of men throughout history who looked good in a beard. I am not one of them. Over the years, I’ve tried growing a beard several times, but after a few weeks, I always gave up. Because I didn’t like the way they looked on me – or made me feel. And I’m never wearing a beard ever again.