VIEW from the BLEACHERS

My personal search for signs of intelligent life in the universe and in my neighborhood

A humor blog

by Tim Jones, BA, JD, MBA, ESQ, FAQ, INC, LOL, WTF, UBU, IDK, ETC

Things I hope people won’t mention at my funeral

by TEJ | Feb 29, 2020 | Lifestyles humor, Parenting and Family humor | 9 Comments

I recently turned 65. When you turn 65, you start asking yourself uncomfortable questions like “How long has that mole been there?” I started to think about my mortality and my funeral and who might actually come to it and what they might have to say about me. And then I started to get worried. Uh oh. This might not end well.

Welcome to Skiing

by TEJ | Feb 23, 2020 | Fun and Leisure Humor | 7 Comments

So, you’ve finally decided to take up the exhilarating sport of downhill skiing. Congratulations! I’m confident that, in no time, with a little advanced planning, you’ll be swishing between moguls, mastering hot dog aerials and being carried away on a stretcher by the ski patrol.

WARNING: IMPROPER USE OF THIS PRODUCT COULD INDICATE YOU’RE AN IDIOT

by TEJ | Feb 17, 2020 | In the News Humor, Pop culture humor | 12 Comments

The Time I Saved Ten Lives

by TEJ | Feb 10, 2020 | Lifestyles humor, Parenting and Family humor | 5 Comments

Many years ago, I saved ten innocent lives from an almost certain death. I really don’t like to talk about it. I don’t consider myself a hero. I was just in the right place at the right time. This is the 100% true retelling of that fateful day. This does not make me a better person than you – okay, well, maybe just a little bit.

Mission Impossible: My brave escape from an Escape Room

by TEJ | Feb 3, 2020 | Fun and Leisure Humor | 6 Comments

If you’re looking for an unusual adventure, try doing an Escape Room, in which you and your friends try to solve puzzles to come up with clues to locate the key to the escape room door. A great way to turn friends against each other and you – in under an hour.

Your Majesty, Are You Looking for a Replacement for Prince Harry?

by TEJ | Jan 28, 2020 | In the News Humor | 3 Comments

I recently read on Twitter that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have decided to bail on the whole Royal Family thing. Rumor has it, the Queen is furious. Not to worry, I know the perfect person to fill in for Harry – ME!