[The following is a true story about my friend Neil. We went to high school together and we are close friends to this day.  – TEJ]

It started with a blanket at an outdoor movie show at the end of their senior year. A chance encounter that would change the destiny of two young people.

Neil was only sixteen years old, a junior at an all-boys’ military academy. He loved computers, something that was just starting to be taught at our school (the year was 1972). He earned good grades, competed on various sports teams, and was excited about heading off to college in another year.

Then suddenly, the trajectory of his life would be forever changed – in a most devastating, cruel way. Neil suffered a massive stroke. It would leave the entire left side of his body paralyzed.

No one saw this coming. It was a freak medical crisis. Miraculously, it did not impact Neil’s mental or speaking abilities in any way. But he could barely move parts of the left side of his body. In the six months following his stroke, he endured painful physical therapy just to help him re-learn how to dress, bathe, and walk.

Throughout his arduous ordeal, Neil wondered to himself: Will I ever walk again? Will I be able to attend college? Will anyone ever want to go out with someone in my condition? Will I ever have children of my own? What will my life become, now that I can’t fully use my left arm, hand, or leg? Doctors told Neil he would never have full use of the left side of his body. They were right.

On top of the physical devastation, Neil’s world shrunk smaller and smaller. He became more introverted than before. His self-confidence was crushed. It was impossible to hide his affliction.

As soon as Neil discovered computers in 1972, he signed up for the first computer programming class his high school ever taught. This became central to his college and career journey.

It was a long, tedious journey. But thanks to Neil’s own enormous perseverance – and several excellent physical therapists – in time, Neil was able to walk again – albeit using only his right side, essentially  thrusting his body to move his uncooperative left leg forward. He took make-up classes and incredibly graduated from high school on time, and with honors.

Neil attended a small area college called Siena College. Because of his mobility limitations Neil was not suited to the challenges of dorm life. He lived at home and commuted to college. Neil learned how to drive using only his right extremities. He dove into his college studies, majoring in math and computers.

On his second day of classes in his freshman year, in an elective course that was his fourth and last choice, called East Asian Studies, Neil sat next to a young woman with kind eyes and short brown hair. Her name was Maryann. They exchanged a few banal pleasantries, but apparently Neil did not make much of an impression on this young woman. I say this because they were in this same class together for two semesters, but they never said another word to each other for the rest of the school year.

Neil and Maryann met on their second day of college. They didn’t speak again until the final day of their senior year. Fate kept them apart… and then brought them together again.

Over the next three years, they never saw each other – except for the occasional casual wave or head nod as they passed each other on campus – because almost all of Neil’s courses were in the college’s science building, while Maryann’s courses were in the business building, since she was an accounting major. Even though Neil really liked Maryann, his introversion and lack of self-confidence kept him from pursuing a closer friendship. He got involved in the Student Senate and the Math Club instead.

Four years went by. It was now the tail end of Neil’s senior year. Final exams were over. All that remained other than Graduation Day were a couple of days on campus filled with a series of social activities for the departing senior class, before they all scattered and headed off on their own separate journeys.

Neil drove to campus to see one of their outdoor movies, a WW II film called A Bridge Too Far. He brought a blanket and sat by himself. As Neil sat, alone on his blanket, three people parked their blanket right next to his. It was that girl from his freshman year. Oh, Neil remembered her name, that’s for sure: Maryann. She was with two other friends. But as they all settled on their blanket, Maryann looked over at Neil’s blanket and casually, without asking, sat with him. Neil was taken aback, of course, but he was delighted by her unexpected move. They chatted casually about nothing in particular, watched the movie, said goodnight, and parted company.

Neil thought about his missed opportunity. He was by now quite smitten by Maryann, but he had no idea whether any of his feelings were reciprocated.

Three days later came graduation. One final chance to see Maryann. Neil watched as she walked across the stage several times to receive one award after another. But he never found the courage to approach her. Opportunity missed, again. As Neil ambled to his car to head home, he glanced across the parking lot. There, in the distance, he spotted Maryann with her parents, getting into their car, about to leave his life forever.

Neil and Maryann, with their son, two daughters, and daughter -in-law. They would go on to have three grandchildren (so far).

Neil realized it was literally now or never. He hopped in his car, took a deep breath to fight his overwhelming pangs of anxiety and fear of the impending rejection he felt certain he was about to experience. He drove right up to Maryann’s parents’ car. He jumped out and headed as quickly as his uncooperative legs would transport him – over to their car. As her parents, no doubt confused, watched this stranger approach their car, Neil hurriedly, with no segue, blurted out, “Maryann, would you like to go out sometime?” He calculated that perhaps by asking her out in front of her parents, she might be less likely to reject him outright. Neil was right. Maryann said yes.

Neil’s bold, if not desperate, move paid off. They would go on to date for a couple years. Then in 1982, Neil and Maryann wed. Over the next four decades, they would travel all over the world. They would go on to have three children and, at last count, three grandchildren, all healthy and thriving. Maryann got involved in photography. Neil started playing golf (yes, golf – and despite only using his right hand, he became quite good at it).

Neil and Maryann traveled all over the world in their marriage, including the Great Wall of China.

Alas, as with some love stories, this one has a bittersweet ending. A few years ago, Maryann was informed she had a dormant, congenital heart condition that would eventually require a heart transplant. In 2022, she had what was initially presumed to be a successful heart replacement surgery – until two weeks after surgery, when several major organs started shutting down. Maryann’s heart was just not strong enough to continue the battle. She passed away in the spring of 2022, after 40 years of marriage.

Neil continues to travel with family members and friends from their church to this day, because Maryann told him in her final months that if she did not pull through, she wanted Neil to promise to continue with the travels they had planned together.

Neil misses his soulmate deeply every day. But he will forever be grateful to Maryann for the happy life they shared together, the wonderful children they raised together, and for her decision so many years ago to sit with him on his blanket.

That’s the view from the bleachers.

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